More Prayer. More Power.

Since we moved to our new house in September, my devotional time has been quite choppy. I'll have spurts of diligence and then they will be drowned out by the busy-ness of life. When I was still working,the one advantage to a 45 minute commute each morning was the literal QUIET time. (This is now one of the rare luxuries for me in life.) During those times I was able to turn off the music and talk to God. It was during those times that the Holy Spirit would speak so much truth to me through the way He would lead my thoughts during my monologue to God. It was the epitome of a therapeutic release of emotion. It was my journey to peace in that moment of confusion. Through those times of prayer, Jesus assumed His rightful place as my Lord before whom I was humbled, my mentor, my confidante, my closest friend. And I saw the blessings of answered prayer because I was actually praying those prayers myself.

But with the sheer collapse of LIFE on me, I have lost that and am struggling to regain it. It's one of those things I know I need to do, but I don't take advantage of the time I can use to do it. But today, I did it. I prayed for the usual folks on my prayer list....and I especially prayed for my kids.

My parenting devotion today was centered around a reminder that we need to believe in the power of prayer and model faith in God as we face the challenges of parenting. I was reminded not to try to overcome these challenges with my own strength, but to trust God to help me. (And trust me, I have many of those "Lord, HELP ME!" moments...)

Seven months ago I found myself overwhelmed by the burden of guilt rooted in my lack of presence and involvement in the lives of my little loves. And now, more than ever, I feel an even greater burden - but not one of guilt... but rather, one of obligation and responsibility. There is so much I've realized in the last two and a half months of being home full time that I want to and need to do and be for my kids. And that's the overwhelming part. And many times I feel either inadequate, ill-equipped or just too darn tired to be my very best at it all.

So thank God for reminding me to continually commit myself and my children to Him, especially in prayer... asking Him to empower me in my efforts to be a godly and effective mother, and trusting that, despite my failures, He will reward my faithfulness in those efforts by caring for my children better than my best ever could.